Having a divorce conversation with your spouse can be challenging regardless of the reasons that led you to it. It may not be easy telling your spouse you want to dissolve the marriage.
However, a few tips can help you hold the conversation successfully. These include:
Be sure
It’s not recommended to drop divorce news in the middle of an argument or “threatening” divorce during a disagreement. Once a divorce is on the table, your relationship can change, whether or not you go through with it.
Therefore, take time to confirm you are sure you want a divorce before putting it on the table. A therapist can help you assess the issues in your marriage and provide you with tools to determine if you are ready for a divorce.
Once you are certain you want a divorce, you can initiate the conversation with your spouse.
Choose an appropriate time
Even though a perfect time for discussing divorce may not exist, you should choose an appropriate time. For instance, it may not be suitable to talk to your spouse when they are leaving for work or after a long day.
It may also be beneficial to avoid raising the matter around holidays or major family events like birthdays, as this may change how they view these important days going forward.
Choose a time when you and your spouse are relaxed, such as on a weekend. If you have children, consider taking them to a loved one over the weekend.
Be firm yet compassionate
When talking to your spouse, you should be direct and firm about your decision yet compassionate. Further, use “I” statements. Blaming them for your decision can complicate the conversation.
If you have decided to get a divorce, obtain as much information as possible from the beginning to make informed decisions.